I’ve been thinking about all the cases of infidelity among famous people lately. I’ve also been thinking about the Catholic sex abuse scandal. Believe it or not, I think there’s a correlation between the two. Hear me out for a minute, ok?

In both cases, unrealistic expectations have been placed on the offending parties. That in no way excuses their behavior, but perhaps we can revise our expectations a little.

In the case of priests, the Church insists they deny their sexual nature. That is just not possible for most people! Then they are constantly surrounded by men and boys; naturally their attention is drawn to what is in front of them on a regular basis. A simple solution would be to lift the ban on celibacy. This idea is even gaining popularity among Catholics, according to a recent survey. It’s an idea whose time has definitely come, IMHO.

Then there are the celebrities. People in the public eye, including actors and politicians, are no different in some ways than us regular folk. Some will cheat, others won’t.

But in another way, they are very different. They are in the limelight, surrounded by adoring fans. Being told how wonderful you are is a powerful aphrodisiac. If you don’t believe me, ask your partner to shower you with compliments for a couple of weeks and see how you feel. I think that if most of us were put in that environment, we might forget we were mere mortals too. Again, this is not intended to excuse their behavior.

Instead, I suggest that we take the noose of insistent monogamy off their necks. Some people are just not inclined to long term monogamy. If we weren’t so uptight about that as a culture, these people wouldn’t be making headlines. If they were honest about themselves to their partners, it wouldn’t be an issue at all.

Our societal rules are hundreds of years old and from a completely different era. I say it’s time to re-think and revise them. Let’s create realistic expectations. And while we’re at it, let’s focus on our own relationships and not worry about what other people are doing.